Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize