I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
