your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
