How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize