I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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