Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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