you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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