We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Who died my cat blue again?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize