Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
