i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
The uberlube is also flammable
you never un-have a 4some
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
