If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
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