Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
