I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
