I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
