is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
