it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
