the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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