you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Come share oat with me in your robe
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
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