i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
