My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Randomize