Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
