Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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