I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
