friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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