I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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