we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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