god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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