Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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