So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
