I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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