Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
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