Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize