nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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