I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
