he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
