her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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