I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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