Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
