maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
