Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
