Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize