Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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