ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
