super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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