Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
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