I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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