Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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