You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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