Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
