im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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