Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
